BY: MR. TAGULIPDAN

Some of our local officials on the island are reportedly declaring a Christmas ceasefire, seemingly relieved after the recent elections. Early Christmas caroling was observed among the candidates as gift-giving became widespread. Potential candidates for congressional, gubernatorial, and other positions seemed to have emptied their pockets due to the generosity. Imagine, if each candidate in a barangay gives 5-10k, multiplied by 315 barangays, the water in the well might indeed run dry…hikhikhikhik!

To make matters worse, as the election blues approach, more people are expected to ask for gifts until 2025…hikhikhihik! Hence, those in power are carefree because there are SOPs (Standard Operating Procedures) that can be used as a patch for gift requests. But for those without positions yet, they will surely face intense expectations in the coming days…hikhihihik!

There are reports that some officials have already posted signs in their offices prohibiting solicitation…hikhkikhikhik!


Is it true that the old Santa Claus will return to the beautiful island and wants to challenge his former ally Santa Claus? HecHec, Horay! If it pushes through, there will be more Santa Clauses on the beautiful island…hikhihik! Well, it’s going to rain goodies on the beautiful island again. Anyway, according to some, when it comes to elections, that’s the only time they receive goodies, so they better make the most of it. Cynics say there’s no limit to how much gossip one can hear about such news…hikhihihik!

The more, the merrier, they say, because for those who worship money during elections, they’ll complain about being poor once the election giveaways are limited to a two-week cell phone load…hikhihkihik! Of course, politicians who lost a significant amount of money will resort to their old ways, embezzling public funds to recover…hikhkhkihik! Think about it. Is there still hope for the beautiful island? When will we, Kaperyodiko, learn?

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